Saturday, 8 March 2008

[4] The Perfect Man...

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This is just for fun dudes! I found an awesome article HERE, about the features and traits that apparantly make "The Perfect Man."
I also read about it in The Sun, a few days ago (NOT that someone of my calibre reads that kind of paper... Noooo....!! Haha)

I've posted it below to see where I match up.
The article itself is in bold, and my thoughts are in regular font.



What makes the Perfect Man?
"HE should be clean-shaven, good-looking and drive a silver Mercedes. (gosh! I'm always presentably baby-faced. I look too Slavic with stubble! And errr...I drive a mercedes car that is SILVER! That is totally the same thing.) And, most important of all, he should be more than 178cm. (What's that? Like, 5'8"? Gosh! I am 5'10"! That is a whole 2" to spare and enjoy there ladies!!)
With blue eyes, short dark-brown hair and medium build. (That's ME dudes!)
Height is apparently more important than looks to women looking for Mr Right, a survey claims.



Looks aside, the perfect partner must also love pets
(HATE smelly horrible animals... but like cats! That totally counts! Cat guys are hot, yo!) and appreciate fine wine, (WHY stop at the 'fine' ones? I appreciate ALL wines!! Though I might be confusing "ABUSE" and "appreciate" here :-/), theatre, (Wow, musicals totally count as 'theatre' dudes!) and nice restaurants. (Mcdonalds is TOTALLY nice!) Coupled with this he should have a "wacky" sense of humour, (WACKY is certainly one way to describe my humour :-/) according to the study of 40,000 women by UKdating.com. Errr hangon... I'm not sure I want the desperados of Ukdating.com to be my target audience! HELP!?



Mr Right wears smart jeans and a T-shirt, (That is like, my standard uniform, right there! Jeans and a tee!) weighs exactly 80.5kg (I weigh like... somewhere around that!! I MUST be Mr.Perfect, yo!) and is a doctor or lawyer who owns a home in a good location. (I'm working on it OK!?)



He has had three serious relationships,
(I have had exactly THREE serious relationships!)no more than six sexual partners, (I'm such a good boy, I've only had four! Room to slot one or two more in then! ;D) has never been married and doesn't have children. (Bugger. That does put a damper on things. But wait... "children" is plural. I have A child, just the one, totally singular. It doesnt say anything about having a "child," just "children" meaning more than one. Hell yeah, I'm back in the game!! ) ."



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I sent the article to Dani and told her all about how happy she should be that she has snagged herself THE PERFECT MAN.
But she pointed out that the perfect man would not be an arrogant knobhead. Burn.
So that's me out of the runnings.

Bugger.

Loki xxx

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